Empty Nest

As I approach the tender age of thirty I've been reflecting on the years that made up my twenties. The ups and downs have been numerous, and yet I find myself feeling more stable than I ever have in many ways.

The greatest moment of my life to date was the birth of Grace. The greatest accomplishment of my life has been becoming the father that I am today. The greatest challenge of my life will be becoming the father that I hope to be. The greatest fear of my life is failing to reach this goal, which I am determined not to allow to happen.

The past year without Gracie has been especially rough for me. I have never known the emptiness that I have felt without my baby here. I have gone out to visit her for a long weekend here and there and they have done an OK job to help with the "Gracie fix," but nothing could ever replace having her here with me.

Consider visiting your child, if you are lucky enough to have one, and they ask you multiple times if they are coming back home with you. Or almost begging you to take them with you...do you know how helpless that makes me feel? My daughter wants only to be with me, her father, and I can't even meet that basic request. I feel so sad, so angry, and so hurt for her and the circumstances that I find us in. She just wants to be with me and I just feel helpless.

I'm too young to have an empty nest, come back home my little birdie...